so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
