Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
