I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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