Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
