Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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