Screwed.edu
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
