Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
