gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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