i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
