I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Text me some of your sweat
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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