He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
