Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
