I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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