How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
