i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
