Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
it's great music for shaving your balls
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
