is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
