you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
