About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
