Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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