Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
my shit smells like andre
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize