then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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