You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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