I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
