I hate all girls vehemently.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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