if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
