I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
