I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
