he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
