these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
