Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
