I hate all girls vehemently.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
