this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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