i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
