Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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