just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
