I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
