Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
