So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
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