Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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