Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
where are my pants?
in the oven.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
