I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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