Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
last night I used snow as a chaser
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
