I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
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