is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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