Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Randomize
