i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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