ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
