The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
