you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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